How misandrist are we?

No boys allowed signYou know misandry? The counter to misogyny—you know it, right? Well you can just imagine my tickled delight when on a Friday afternoon at the end of a long and very frustrating week, the How Misandrist Are You? Quiz popped up in my feed. The next ten minutes were wrought with giggles, chortles, and snorts from me and my surrounding coworkers, men and women alike.

This quiz fascinated me. Some of the points were just downright silly, and meant to be. The clever authors gathered together everything from obviously off-the-deep-end actions (bathing in the tears of men) to counterpoints to everyday misogyny (walked by a man and told him to “smile”) to some points that are actually quite popular among some feminists (ahem, me) I know (Used the term “Herstory”).

Now here’s how this quiz got me thinking. I have a deep respect for the women’s rights movements that have carved out space and opportunities for people like me in this world. I fully recognize the value and necessity of thinking through patriarchy, rights, and gender liberation in the relative safety and comfort of “female only” spaces. It’s after those marginalized members of a society have done a bulk of thinking and growing and visioning and planning that we need to take stock and reconsider strategies. I think that time is now.

As a movement, it’s important that we take what we’ve learned about confining gender binaries, about sexualized violence, and apply it broadly. We’ve gotten pretty darn good at being person centered when providing services. We’ve worked so hard to create places where people feel safe to open up with their stories of violence and begin to heal. We are Jedi masters of the art of recognizing the divine humanity in any person who comes through our doors. We are courageous explorers bursting out into the places in our communities that crave messages of hope and healing.

Why, I ask you, why!? Why should we set aside these awesome powers if the person who seeks our help is one of the “mens.” It saddens me to hear stories of organizations that balk at serving men…or children…or people with disabilities. Yet, I learn of another organization every day. Healing should be an equal opportunity experience. What are you doing to open your doors to all?


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